Just The Right Bullets

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Rating: R

Runtime: 154 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 173 million (approximately)

Characters: Jules Winnfield, Vincent Vega, Mia Wallace, Butch Coolidge, Marsellus Wallace, Fabienne, Pumpkin, Honey Bunny, Lance, Jody, Trudi, Zed, Maynard, The Gimp, Marvin, Jimmie, The Wolf, Esmarelda Villalobos, Captain Koons

Favorite Quote: Mia Wallace’s Fox Force Five joke (spoiler alert ... it’s about a family of tomatoes and ketchup)

Favorite Scene: Mia and Vincent’s dinner date at Jack Rabbit Slim’s

Favorite Character: Mia Wallace

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Quentin Tarantino: Reservoir Dogs

After watching this movie for my review, I realized it had been about twenty years since I had last seen it. I think twenty years ago Jeff probably viewed this movie a lot differently. Jules was probably my favorite character then (he had a bad mother fucker wallet!!). Now, it is Mia Wallace. I still love Jules, and there were several other characters that were great and worthy of favorite status (Vincent, Butch, Marsellus, The Wolf), but Mia is amazing. Every scene she is in you can’t take your eyes off her. She’s cool, funny, and she can dance. Not only is she my favorite character, she delivers my favorite quote from the movie and she is in my favorite scene.

I have been known to tell a pun or two in my time, so when Mia tells her Fox Force Five joke, I knew that would be my choice for favorite quote. As for favorite scene, I picked Mia and Vincent’s conversation before/during their dinner at Jack Rabbit Slim’s. I am sure most people would choose the twist contest or the overdose/needle scene, and I almost went with the Jules and Vincent breakfast scene. But the back and forth between Mia and Vincent is so cool and funny, and you can totally see/feel the tension building between them of something that could have been. It’s kind of like the opposite of every one of the first dates that I ever went on.

One of the most talked about things from the movie is the briefcase. What is inside?? I am ok with it never being revealed. My guess would be Larry Bird’s jersey, or maybe a copy of Back to the Future on VHS. One of the least talked about things from the movie is Jack Rabbit Slim’s. I would eat there all the time if it were in my town. Pretty sure my go-to meal would have been the Slim’s Famous Speedburger, Cherry Coke, and a slice of pumpkin pie. Total bill (with tip): $22.00. Oh, and a Five Dollar Shake.

Next movie to review: Clerks

A Good Man Is Hard To Find

Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 125 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 359 million (approximately)

Characters: Daniel Hillard, Euphegenia Doubtfire, Miranda Hillard, Lydia Hillard, Chris Hillard, Natalie Hillard, Stuart Dunmeyer, Jonathan Lundy, Mrs. Sellner, Frank, Jack

Favorite Quote: “It was a run-by fruiting.”

Favorite Scene: Daniel playing with the dinosaur toys

Favorite Character: Daniel Hillard

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Chris Columbus: Home Alone

It’s only the second comedy movie on my list so far (Groundhog Day being the other). I found the two similar in that they are both really funny, but really sad and depressing at the same time. Daniel Hillard/Euphegenia Doubtfire are played brilliantly by Robin Williams. Miranda Hillard is the classic not fun mom. Their kids (Lydia, Chris, and Natalie) are grumpy, awkward, and cute. Stuart Dunmeyer is the classic man moving into the possible new dad role. You have to hate him, but it’s possible he is a really nice guy. And Jonathan Lundy is the classic boss who enjoys his scotchy scotch scotch. My favorite character is Daniel, because if I was a dad, I would be like him. He likes to “Jump Around”, be funny at the wrong time, and wear a dress.

With Robin Williams being in the movie, there are of course hilarious things being said and done at an extremely fast pace. My favorite quote is “It was a run-by fruiting.” My favorite scene is when Daniel is playing with the dinosaur toys at the television station ... though the dinner scene where Daniel/Mrs. Doubtfire have to be in two places at once is amazing yet uncomfortable at the same time. You try to look away because you know it is going to end badly but you can’t. There are also two sweet montages in the movie where Mrs. Doubtfire is getting stuff done while “Dude Looks Like a Lady” and “Walk Like a Man” are playing.

The “man dresses up as a woman” role in movies has been around for a long time. Some Like it Hot is a classic, and then there are Tootsie (I have never seen it but I hear it is great) and Big Momma’s House, which somehow had two sequels even though the first one wasn’t that funny. I would say this is probably the best because it’s Robin Williams, quite possibly the funniest person ever. I can’t wait to get to Good Will Hunting, which is on my list ... only ten movies away!!

Next movie to review: Pulp Fiction

Drunk On The Moon

Dazed and Confused (1993)

Rating: R

Runtime: 103 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 13 million (approximately)

Characters: Randall “Pink” Floyd, Mitch Kramer, Jodi Kramer, Sabrina Davis, David Wooderson, Clint Bruno, Carl Burnett, Michelle Burroughs, Don Dawson, Cynthia Dunn, Kaye Faulkner, Hirshfelder, Tommy Houston, Simone Kerr, Darla Marks, Mike Newhouse, Fred O’Bannion, Benny O’Donnell, Tony Olson, Kevin Pickford, Julie Simms, Ron Slater, Melvin Spivey, Shavonne Wright, Nesi White

Favorite Quote: “That’s what I love about these high school girls, man; I get older, they stay the same age.”

Favorite Scene: Wooderson, Pink, and Mitch enter the Emporium

Favorite Character: Simone Kerr

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Richard Linklater: Before Sunrise ... I hear it’s good

Cars. Drugs. Music. Gilligan’s Island?? This movie is full of all of these. When the movie was released, the soundtracks (remember soundtracks?) were actually bigger than the movie. Aerosmith, Black Sabbath, Bob Dylan, Kiss, The Runaways ... and about 20 other bands/performers are all rolled (see what I did there?) up into one day in 1976. But the movie is really all about the characters. And there are a lot of them. I would say 24 people all play major roles in this film (and another that doesn’t have any lines but people are always mentioning her being in the movie ... yay Renee Zellweger!) The jocks, the popular girls, the nerds, the bullies, the stoners are all represented. In my opinion, the movie is really about the senior/freshman relationships between Pink/Mitch and Jodi/Sabrina, and Wooderson (the town creepy guy); he is out of high school but still likes the high school girls ... we will get to that later.

Ok, to the favorites. I am sure everyone will have different answers than me. “Alright, alright, alright” is a good one that some people probably say at least once a day. My girlfriend Rebecca does not like “I only came here to do two things, man; kick some ass and drink some beer ... looks like we’re almost out of beer” because it totally rips off Roddy Piper’s classic line from They Live where he is there to chew bubble gum and kick ass but is out of bubble gum. I went with the creepy Wooderson “That’s what I love about these high school girls, man; I get older, they stay the same age” quote, because it’s so creepy it’s not. Side note: I always thought Wooderson was around 25 but he might only be 20. My favorite scene is when Wooderson, Pink, and Mitch enter the Emporium. It’s like a past, present, and future of cool guys, and even though it’s only about 30 seconds long, Wooderson owns it. He’s so awesome in that moment!!

My favorite character is someone you might not expect it to be. Not Pink. Not Wooderson. Not O’Bannion. Not Slater. It’s Simone. She’s kind of the secret weapon in the movie. She has some funny lines, she is not mean to the freshman, and she seems really cool. And I used to have a crush on Joey Lauren Adams. I wish I had picked Chasing Amy to be on my list!!

Next movie to review: Mrs. Doubtfire

Everything Goes To Hell

Jurassic Park (1993)

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 127 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 586 million (approximately)

Characters: Dr. Alan Grant, Dr. Ellie Sattler, Dr. Ian Malcolm, Lex, Tim, John Hammond, Robert Muldoon, Donald Gennaro, Dennis, Ray, Dr. Henry Wu

Favorite Quote: “Life, uh, finds a way.”

Favorite Scene: T-Rex chases the jeep

Favorite Character: Ray Arnold

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Steven Spielberg: Schindler’s List, Saving Private Ryan

I remember going to the theater to see this when I was in high school. I am pretty sure it was the biggest movie I had ever been to at that point of my life. It was amazing then, and I think it is still amazing now. There are several characters in the movie to watch and enjoy (Dr. Grant, Dr. Sattler, Dr. Malcolm), Ray Arnold (my favorite ... it’s Samuel L. Jackson!!). The score is fantastic, probably one of the most recognizable of all time. But the movie is all about the dinosaurs. The CGI was groundbreaking and made the dinosaurs absolutely terrifying. All of your favorites are there: Dilophosaurus, Velociraptor, Triceratops, and of course Tyrannosaurus rex. Speaking of T-Rex: my favorite scene in the movie is when she chases Ellie, Ian, and Muldoon in the jeep.

Visually, there is so much to see during the movie, so I feel that the dialogue kind of gets lost. There are some classic lines: “Hold on to your butts” and “Clever girl”, but mine, and probably everyone’s, favorite is Jeff Goldblum at his finest: “Life, uh, finds a way.” I almost went with “It’s not the raptor you see that gets you; it’s the two that come in from the side.” Side note: one time I was trying to be funny at work, and I told a story about going to a bar once, and it wasn’t the milk I was drinking that got me drunk, it was the two that came in from the side that did. It made no sense, but everyone thought it was hilarious.

I am not absolutely positive about this, but I am pretty sure nobody has ever directed two movies in the same year as big or important as Spielberg in 1993. Jurassic Park was the biggest box office movie of the year, and Schindler’s List won Best Picture. Side note: I have never seen Schindler’s List in its entirety. I went to the theater to see it on a school trip and I fell asleep about 30 minutes into it. I am pretty sure this makes me a terrible person somehow.

Next movie to review: Dazed and Confused

Yesterday Is Here

Groundhog Day (1993)

Rating: PG

Runtime: 101 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 116 million (approximately)

Characters: Phil Connors, Rita Hanson, Larry, Ned Ryerson, Nancy Taylor, Buster Green, Fred, Debbie, Punxsutawney Phil

Favorite Quote: “Watch out for that first step, it’s a doozy.”

Favorite Scene: Phil kidnaps Punxsutawney Phil

Favorite Character: Phil Connors

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Harold Ramis: none

Bill Murray at his finest!! His transition from sarcastic to grumpy to happy is what makes this movie so funny. I don’t think anyone else could have played it better. There are some other solid characters in the movie: Rita, who loves a sweet vermouth on the rocks with a twist, is a woman worth getting to know better, and Ned Ryerson is definitely a man you would want to avoid if you saw him walking in your direction. But be careful crossing the street in an attempt to get away from him, because that first step is a doozy!! The scene where Phil finally snaps and kidnaps Punxsutawney Phil is brilliant. Bill Murray in a truck driven by a groundhog ... pure genius!!

This movie tackles a topic that is pretty interesting: what would you do if you kept living the same day over and over again?? Would you do good ... or bad?? Phil’s first intentions are bad: he robs a bank truck and tricks (?) two women into falling for him. He then becomes less harmful, when after several viewings of Jeopardy! wows a room by getting all the questions right. By the end he is doing nothing but good; he masters the art of flipping cards into a hat, tries to help a homeless man, learns to play the piano and how to ice sculpt, catches a kid that falls out of a tree, fixes an old woman’s flat tire, performs the Heimlich maneuver on a man in a restaurant, and buys Fred and Debbie two tickets to WrestleMania.

Two of my favorite little details in the movie are that after Phil finally changes his life and decides to do good things for people without wanting anything back, we find out that his life is worth exactly $339.88, which is what Rita pays for him at the charity bachelor auction. The other thing is when Phil is reading Rita poetry to keep her awake, one of the poems he reads her is Joyce Kilmer’s “Trees”. I only caught this detail this last time because I recently attended a workshop taught by my friend Amber. I guess it is a pretty famous poem, so thanks Amber for teaching me something!!

Next movie to review: Jurassic Park