The One That Got Away

The Usual Suspects (1995)

Rating: R

Runtime: 106 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 36 million (approximately)

Characters: Roger “Verbal” Kint, Dave Kujan, Fred Fenster, Todd Hockney, Dean Keaton, Michael McManus, Jack Baer, Jeffrey Rabin, Edie Finneran, Mr. Kobayashi, Keyser Soze

Favorite Quote: “Hand me the keys you fucking cocksucker.”

Favorite Scene: The first 10 seconds we see Verbal in the interrogation room

Favorite Character: Fenster

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Bryan Singer: none

I did not see this movie when it came out in the theaters and it wasn’t until after the ending was spoiled for me that I did. Of course that totally ruined it for me, but it was still a really good movie once I did watch it. The characters and the storytelling are fantastic. The main five guys are all great in their own way. Everyone’s favorite is probably Verbal, but Fenster is mine. He is hilarious. Side note: funny story ... Excess Baggage was the first movie I saw starring Benicio del Toro. And I am pretty sure I saw it at least three times. But let’s not talk about that. Fenster delivers many laughs in this movie, and the one I liked the best was his interpretation of the line “Hand me the keys you fucking cocksucker” during the line-up.

The ending of the movie is probably one of the best ever, but since I already knew what was going to happen I chose another scene in the movie as my favorite. It is a very short scene (about 10 seconds), but it is so good. It’s when we are first introduced to Verbal in the movie, and (though we don’t know it at the time) it is where he comes up with the story he tells Special Agent Dave Kujan just by scanning the bulletin board hanging on the wall. As for the ending, I think it was one of if not the first movie from the nineties that had a huge “twist” that had everybody talking. And then it seemed that every movie to follow in the nineties tried to top it.

I am sure this movie would have been one of my favorites at the time if I had seen it right away, and it’s probably impossible for anyone to have avoided spoilers now over 22 years later. But if it is ever on TV I would have a hard time not watching it, and if you have somehow never heard of/seen this/been spoiled on this movie, see it before it’s too late. Hopefully, if you made it this far in my review, I haven’t given anything away.

Next movie to review: Toy Story

Watch Her Disappear

Clueless (1995)

Rating: PG-13

Runtime: 97 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 88 million (approximately)

Characters: Cher Horowitz, Dionne Davenport, Tai Frasier, Murray Duvall, Josh Lucas, Travis Birkenstock, Amber, Christian, Elton, Summer, Mel Horowitz, Ms. Geist, Mr. Hall, Ms. Stoeger, Lucy

Favorite Quote: “They’re playing our song. The one that Elton and I danced to. ‘Rollin’ With the Homies’.”

Favorite Scene: Any scene where Cher is watching Beavis and Butt-Head or The Ren & Stimpy Show

Favorite Character: Josh

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Amy Heckerling: none

I expected this movie to have the most dated feel to it from my list, but I think that it was almost a parody of itself so it may have been ahead of its time and holds up extremely well. It is loaded with nineties catchphrases like “Snaps”, “As if”, “Surfing the crimson wave”, “Herbal refreshment”, and “Totally buggin’”, and pop culture references to The Cranberries, Marky Mark, Mentos, Twin Peaks, Christian Slater, Luke Perry, Pauly Shore, Jason Priestly, The Real World, and Forrest Gump. There are a lot of fresh new faces to love in this movie: Cher the popular girl, Dionne the best friend, Tai the new girl, Murray the boyfriend, Travis the stoner, Amber the rival, Christian the gay friend, Elton the jerk, Summer the quiet friend, Mel the protective father, Ms. Geist and Mr. Hall the teachers who fall in love, and Ms. Stoeger the stereotypical phys ed teacher. But my favorite is Josh, the tries-to-be cool college kid who is really just a big dork.

Speaking of Josh, he is a big fan of Radiohead, and I was a big fan of the soundtrack when it came out. Mostly for the Counting Crows song that was on it, but it also had fun songs from Radiohead, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Coolio, and Jill Sobule. My favorite quote is when Tai says “They’re playing our song. The one that Elton and I danced to. ‘Rollin’ With the Homies’.” I have always found it funny that that song could be someone’s song. My favorite scene was any involving Cher watching Beavis and Butt-Head or Ren & Stimpy because it’s kind of cute, and I can see myself being into a girl like that when I was in high school.

I prefer this movie over Fast Times at Ridgemont High (Amy Heckerling’s directorial debut and a movie from my essential eighties movie list). Maybe it’s because this movie has a song covered by Jewel in it (“All By Myself”) or a scene where they play “suck and blow” a party game I wish I had been a part of when I was seventeen.

Next movie to review: The Usual Suspects

I Can't Wait To Get Off Work

Clerks (1994)

Rating: R

Runtime: 92 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 5 million (approximately)

Characters: Dante Hicks, Randal Graves, Veronica Loughran, Caitlin Bree, Jay, Silent Bob, Heather Jones, Rick Derris, William, Olaf, Chewlies Gum rep, Old Man, Egg Man, Jizz Mopper, Milk Maid, Cat, Dog

Favorite Quote: “I’m not even supposed to be here today.”

Favorites Scene: Silent Bob’s speech at the end about Veronica and lasagna

Favorite Character: Silent Bob

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Kevin Smith: Chasing Amy

Funny story ... I had never heard of this movie until after I saw Chasing Amy in 1997. This film pretty much sums up how I felt in the mid to late nineties working at a movie theater and the almost ten years working at a video store (like Randal!!): “This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fuckin’ customers.” There is a lot of great dialogue (I never knew what it meant to snowball someone) and interesting characters throughout the movie: Dante (the slacker), Randal (the best friend), Veronica (the girlfriend), Caitlin (the ex-girlfriend), Heather Jones and Rick Derris (the “hey, I remember you from high school” people you always seem to run into), the Old Man, the Egg Man, the Jizz Mopper, and the Milk Maid.

Like I mentioned before, there is much great dialogue to choose from for favorite quote. There is a fantastic breakdown of Return of the Jedi, a shocking reveal of the girlfriend who sucked 37 dicks, and a song about Chewbacca ... what a Wookiee!! But I like the classic “I’m not even supposed to be here today”, which is said several times throughout the film by Dante (he who loves hockey and smells of shoe polish). Even though I mentioned several characters above, the two I didn’t mention, Jay and Silent Bob, are probably everybody’s favorite. I think me at age 21 loved Jay, but me at 41 loves Silent Bob. He doesn’t say much, but when he does it’s memorable. Dante thinks he has it all figured out, but Silent Bob (in my favorite scene) is the one who knows the meaning of life: someone who cares about you and brings you food is the one you should be with.

Clerks is the movie on my list that made the least amount of money at the box office, but I remember reading somewhere that it was the VHS most likely to be stolen from a video store. So it’s got that goin’ for it, which is nice.

Next movie to review: Clueless

Just The Right Bullets

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Rating: R

Runtime: 154 minutes

Box Office (in today’s dollars): 173 million (approximately)

Characters: Jules Winnfield, Vincent Vega, Mia Wallace, Butch Coolidge, Marsellus Wallace, Fabienne, Pumpkin, Honey Bunny, Lance, Jody, Trudi, Zed, Maynard, The Gimp, Marvin, Jimmie, The Wolf, Esmarelda Villalobos, Captain Koons

Favorite Quote: Mia Wallace’s Fox Force Five joke (spoiler alert ... it’s about a family of tomatoes and ketchup)

Favorite Scene: Mia and Vincent’s dinner date at Jack Rabbit Slim’s

Favorite Character: Mia Wallace

Other need-to-see nineties movies directed by Quentin Tarantino: Reservoir Dogs

After watching this movie for my review, I realized it had been about twenty years since I had last seen it. I think twenty years ago Jeff probably viewed this movie a lot differently. Jules was probably my favorite character then (he had a bad mother fucker wallet!!). Now, it is Mia Wallace. I still love Jules, and there were several other characters that were great and worthy of favorite status (Vincent, Butch, Marsellus, The Wolf), but Mia is amazing. Every scene she is in you can’t take your eyes off her. She’s cool, funny, and she can dance. Not only is she my favorite character, she delivers my favorite quote from the movie and she is in my favorite scene.

I have been known to tell a pun or two in my time, so when Mia tells her Fox Force Five joke, I knew that would be my choice for favorite quote. As for favorite scene, I picked Mia and Vincent’s conversation before/during their dinner at Jack Rabbit Slim’s. I am sure most people would choose the twist contest or the overdose/needle scene, and I almost went with the Jules and Vincent breakfast scene. But the back and forth between Mia and Vincent is so cool and funny, and you can totally see/feel the tension building between them of something that could have been. It’s kind of like the opposite of every one of the first dates that I ever went on.

One of the most talked about things from the movie is the briefcase. What is inside?? I am ok with it never being revealed. My guess would be Larry Bird’s jersey, or maybe a copy of Back to the Future on VHS. One of the least talked about things from the movie is Jack Rabbit Slim’s. I would eat there all the time if it were in my town. Pretty sure my go-to meal would have been the Slim’s Famous Speedburger, Cherry Coke, and a slice of pumpkin pie. Total bill (with tip): $22.00. Oh, and a Five Dollar Shake.

Next movie to review: Clerks